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July 6, 2010

Autobiographical Listening Set-Aside

Cognitive Coaching^SM has four "capabilities of a mediator" which Costa and Garmston describe as "metacognitive attributes of a mediator."¹ Those capabilities or attributes are:

1. Know one's intentions and choose congruent behaviors.
    
2. Adjust one's style preferences.
    
3. Navigate between and within coaching maps and support functions to guide mediational interactions.
    
4. Set aside unproductive patterns of listening, responding, and inquiring.²

During the month of July, "Sustaining the Journey" will be focusing on setting aside unproductive patterns of listening, responding, and inquiring.

An autobiographical listener makes statements like, "I remember when that happened to me. . . ," and uses first person pronouns like, "my," "I," or "me." There are some dangers to autobiographical listening. The coach's distraction away from the thinker's story to one of his or her own may invite judgments or comparisons. Simply remembering to shift the pronouns to second person can help a coach avoid autobiographical listening. Sometimes a simple kinesthetic action like subtly pointing the index finger toward the speaker can help a coach avoid autobiography. When coaches are autobiographical, they are "identifying" with the speakers' issues or commiserating with the speaker, not mediating the speakers' thinking.

This week, as you practice your listening set-asides, notice how often you think autobiographically. Notice how thinking autobiographically invites comparisons or judgments. What strategies might work for you to divert your thinking from your own story to that of the thinker's story?
 

¹Costa, A., & Garmston, R. (2002) Cognitive Coaching: A Foundation for Renaissance Schools. Norwood, MA: Christopher-Gordon Publishers, p. 64.

²Costa, A., & Garmston, R. (2010) Cognitive Coaching Foundation Seminar Learning Guide. Highlands Ranch, CO: Center for Cognitive Coaching, p.32.